May 2013 – The Zwingli Farm
I placed the book down on the counter in front of me and I let the tears fall. Brennon, our son, has been home visiting for a couple days. He walks over, gives me a kiss on the cheek and gently rubs my back. My emotions have been like a roller coaster for the past month. I’m still struggling with what I’ve been shown and I’m so glad my family is supporting me through this life-altering experience. I’m feeling absolutely overwhelmed and I’m searching for the answers to where I was, what it all means and what I should be doing with what I’ve learned.
I have just had an aha moment linked to a book I started reading a couple days ago. The book is called Proof of Heaven written by Eben Alexander, M.D. The near death experience (NDE) I had has me reaching for all kinds of resources to read about the afterlife as I try to figure out what exactly happened to me. In Proof of Heaven, the author mentions the term “Om” in place of the name God or Creator. This word alone has hit me like a ton of bricks.
Ever since I’ve crossed over I’ve been experiencing a strange but beautiful sensation while falling asleep at night. Just before my body becomes totally relaxed, and even before I’m sound asleep, I feel myself gently lift off the bed and a soft rocking motion begins. It’s at this stage of relaxation/sleep that I speak out loud the word “Om.” I don’t remember anything that happens after I have said this. I wake the next morning after having an amazing sleep and I’m somewhat puzzled as to why I keep saying “Om.” Why am I saying this word on the cusp of sleep?
I have heard the word referred to during yoga sessions. I do realize that it’s a mantra that helps people connect to their inner loving source during meditation. I’m just not sure why it’s coming out of my mouth just as I fall into the unconscious state of sleep. This has been happening every night for the past month. I asked my husband, Trent, if he hears me say something just before I fall asleep. He says he does, but he’s just not sure of the word that I’m saying. He says that I’m saying it very quietly and he can’t make it out. I, however, do know the word I’m speaking and before reading Eben Alexander’s explanation I was unsure of what it could mean to me.
I glance down at the book and realize that Eben has just explained another meaning of this word to me, and I’m blown away. Tears continue to run down my cheek because the explanation is almost more than I can grasp. I now realize that I’m softly calling our Creator’s name as I’m falling asleep. I realize how beautiful it is that my soul, just at the onset of sleep, is acknowledging its maker. My soul is very much aware of what I’m doing but my physical body doesn’t have a clue why this is occurring.
I think back to the previous night when I whispered Om ; at the time I was hardly conscience enough to realize it. I also understand now that the rocking motion that I’m feeling as I drift off to sleep is Om holding me. I think back to a spiritual picture my parents had hanging in their home. The following verse was inscribed over Gods hands in this picture: “I will hold you in the palm of my hands.” I now know beyond a shadow of a doubt – this is what I’ve been experiencing. An absolute peace comes over me and I wipe my tears away.
This is the first time Brennon has seen me since my surgery. He’s home for a weeklong visit. Trent and I love the time he spends with us. Over the course of a week he has listened to the entire NDE, and I have explained to him everything that has happened to me. It’s been a real eye opener for all of us.
I know over the course of the next few weeks, months and years Om will continue to share the secrets of the universe with me. I have been crying tears of joy for the past few weeks; I’ve been given the chance to learn more about this life we’re living. I’m more than grateful for this favourable outcome.
I still have the opportunity to hold my babies and sleep beside my husband. I do also realize that when their time comes and they are called home, they will be held in the palm of Om’s hands, and the spirits on the other side will welcome their arrival with unconditional love. We need to find solace in knowing that as we mourn the loss of a loved one on earth, heaven and all the angels will be cheering on their arrival.
Ask, listen and be watchful,